This week is moving right along…Thursday…here on the Front
Porch….
Today’s word is EULOGIZE. Interesting word…usually associated with
death…funerals…means to speak or write in commendation of another, celebrate,
applaud, compliment, appreciate.
Let’s talk about the words that will be spoken of us when
it’s all said and done, when we are gone, when our journey here on earth
ends. EULOGIZE.
What will ‘they’…as in family, friends, co-workers,
acquaintances….have to say on our behalf at our funeral or memorial
service. Oh, perhaps the ‘formal’
presentation will say things like good father, good neighbor, good husband,
good provider…good bowler…
The Preacher was called upon to conduct a funeral service
many years ago. Young lady came to the
church, had some small children. Her
husband did not come to church…too busy with his hobbies and work and just did
not see the need. This was back in the
day when the CB craze was the in thing (some of you younger ones will say
‘what’?).
This wife’s husband and her brother were putting up a high
powered CB antenna on his roof.
Something went awry. Something
went very wrong. Somehow the antenna
came in contact with an electrical wire and POW…the husband and brother were
gone…instantly...just like that…not a moment to consider life or death, make
things ‘right’..say goodbye to family…put affairs in order. GONE…as can happen to any of us, at any time
in oh, so many ways. Heart attack, car
accident, crazed gunmen shooting up the place we just happen to be in…think you
get the point. Here one moment, gone the
next.
Preacher went to talk to this young widow, who lost her
husband and brother so tragically, so suddenly in this bizarre accident. Not knowing the young men, neither one, he
asked the wife about her husband’s life…what could the Preacher say at his
funeral...EULOGIZE.
To Preacher’s dismay and surprise, the young widow stumbled
around, trying to find something to say…now Preacher expected a variety of
responses…but all she could think of was ‘he
was a good bowler’…that was
it…nothing more. Preacher prayed with
the widow, gave her words of comfort, completed the arrangements for the
funeral and left…shook up, saddened and shocked that someone’s life could be
summed up with only 5 words…’he was a
good bowler’…nothing more. Somehow
Preacher got through the funeral…but he and I determined…to live a ‘lifestyle’
in such a way that more could be said about us than ‘he was a good bowler’.
So, my friend, what will be said about you after you have
taken your last breath, closed your eyes for the final time, after your soul
escapes your broken, tired body and you are laid to rest….No, not the soul…if
you are saved and know Jesus as your Savior…your life just begins…rejoicing,
shouting, hooping, hollering and jumping, leaping….whoohooo.. Graduation Day!
The shell, the cage, the container, the instrument you were
given to house your soul, and how you used it will be EULOGIZED.
What will be said of you?
Were you nice, sweet, kind, good and helpful? Or, will you be remembered as the grumpy, grouchy,
grouse person? Were you one, who loved
God, loved family and loved country? Or were you the abuser, user, adulterer,
heart breaker, home wrecker? Perhaps you were a promise keeper, hard worker,
provider for family, made time for friends and family. Maybe the one who was
stingy, grabbing, cheating, stealing, untrustworthy, unreliable, lazy, looking
for that handout, others to pay your way...were you looking for someone to give,
give and give again-never satisfied with anything or anyone. Or will you be known as the giver, caring for
family, God’s creation, blessing His name, His servant, His handmaiden,
trustworthy, steady, and true? Were you faithful and a lover of God? Or were
you disobedient, a blasphemer?
EULOGIZE…the formal speech
will probably be full of ‘filler material’…generalizations about life,
death…kinda like a ‘canned, prepared speech’…could be said about anybody. This EULOGIZING
is usually positive and comforting to friends and families. BUT, the real test is what is thought by
friends and family. What is said in hushed tones between friends and family?
EULOGIZE…your story, your
life summed up in 20-30 minutes…Your song, your allotted time here on earth...what
are you choosing to do with it?
Squander, waste, hide it away or are you using it wisely: back to UTILIZE...using what is in your hand, what you have
been given to work with while here on earth.
Every one of us has a story…it is ours and ours alone…no one
else has one like it…even family members cannot share your story. It is as unique as we are. We write it, add to it, minute by minute,
action and reaction, experiences, successes and failures. Our story. Good, bad; we do; good, bad; done to us. It is all written and woven; our life, our
story.
Along the way we encounter people, places and problems that
can help mold us, shape us or break us. Stuff tries to destroy us; wounds,
sometimes deep, damaging wounds…which become scars. Battle scars, wounded, bruised, battered,
neglected, and abused. ALL of us have
‘issues’ of one type or another. These
experiences become part of our story…woven into who we are, what we are, why we
are. Abusers usually beget abusers,
alcoholics beget alcoholics, grumps beget grumps…think you get the picture…so
along our life and in writing our story for our eulogy…allow
the good and bad to ‘work together for our good’ as our Lord instructed. Even the worst of situations, on the most
horrible day…. all can blend together and some good come out of it-eventually.
Preacher recommended a book for me to read. Neither he nor I
usually read this particular author.
BUT, Preacher is always interested in books about presidents-especially
JFK…was there a conspiracy? Was there a second-third shooter? Anyway, the book. 11/23/63 by Stephen
King. Yep. The Stephen King. This is a
different venue for King...no snarling rabid dogs, no fire starting, burning
everyone, up teenager, no murdering car…
It’s a book about time travel-going back in time and
righting the wrongs, stopping events-tragic ones from occurring. I am still
working on it…but the premise is live the life you are dealt…let it mold you
into the person you are meant to be for even the most tragic events can become
something of value in our life. Somehow,
the main character goes back to 1963 to intervene in the JKF assassination and
put a few other wrongs right…and the result is tragedy…Worst than what actually
happened the first time around. Perhaps when I finish the book I can give you
more of my take on this.
So in our story-our life-we are going to have scars…battle
wounds…things that hurt us to the core, but we become better for enduring and
surviving them.
EULOGIZE…the story…the
scars…become our song…the final verse of our life…the summary the eulogy.
So when it is all said and done…what have you said and done
with your life. Much like the parable of
the talents we talked about a few days ago...utilizing…prioritizing, organizing…our life
is about those ‘ize’
words and many more…remember suffix ‘ize’ means to cause to be.
In a few short days it will be another anniversary of my
father’s death. I wrote about his tragic
life on a blog about a year ago. This
time of the year always brings memories to the surface…usually unpleasant. I cannot recall, few, if any good memories of
my father.
If I had to EULOGIZE his life:
‘a lost boy, who
became a lost man, who never found his place in this world’.
He had a story, like
we all do, but he never allowed the wounds he received as a child to ever
heal…the wounds of abandonment, poverty, alcoholism at an early age, low
self-esteem,
just to name a few, to
never heal.
The wounds were re-opened again and again
throughout his life. His story became
alcohol and the more the better. He never did discover his song...never was
able to ‘sing’ about anything good about his life. If anything, he left a sad legacy of
alcoholic children, dysfunctional, lost in their own scars and feelings of
abandonment…
EULOGIZE…when it is done…what
is going to be said about us?
Something to think about…as you leave the Front Porch…
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